My Dragon Lady Mother
My Dragon Lady Mother

We used to call my mom “The Dragon Lady.”    I haven’t yet read Amy Chau’s “Battle Hymn of the Tiger Mom.”   But hearing the buzz, I can tell there are many mommy similarities.

My mom was a chemical engineer who went to law school after my younger sister Debbie was born.  She gave birth to my siblings Susan and Jennifer the first two years and was seven months pregnant with Gregory when she graduated the third year.  To this day, her classmates recall that she seemed to always be “sick” and lying down in the black of class.

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Karen Koehlerfamily
Direct exam of a medical expert

I'm on the treadmill watching Oprah.  She is interviewing Dr. Oz.   Their theme "5 lifesaving numbers."  He gives vivid easy to understand verbal answers.  He uses a video recreation.  He has a demonstrative aid.  I like it when he punches the plaque out of the artery.   It is really super.   Oprah is a phenomenal interviewer.  She channels the audience.  She “is” the audience in the moment.  Her goal is to educate and impress upon the audience, the importance of understanding and following Dr. Oz’s medical advice.

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Karen Koehlerdefense medical examiners, direct exam, experts
Quick List of Objections

“Objection your Honor – counsel is badgering the witness!”   The days of speaking objections during jury trials may well be numbered.  Most judges now specifically instruct counsel only to object “as to form."   Some judges permit a brief statement of the basis of the objection such as “leading.”  Sidebars outside the presence of the jury are used to address the details.  The problem with sidebars is that they occur off the record.  At the next available recess, make sure to restate the details of the objection on the record.

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Karen Koehlerobjections
Rob McKenna's nasty crusade
Rob McKenna's nasty crusade

Like the Sheriff of Nottingham Forest, our Attorney General is on quite a crusade.  According to him, our poor government is in a big gigantic financial mess and guess who’s to blame – why the trial attorneys of course! They file “abusive lawsuits.”  Prey against “vulnerable” taxpayers.  Take money from the injured and apparently give it to the democrats.

McKenna hopes that citizens will rise to his Shakespearean cry of “kill all the lawyers.”  Ummm.  Excuse me.  But isn’t McKenna the King of all Washington lawyers…

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Karen Koehlerlawyer life, legal profession
Dear Bar Association. My number one goal isn't to be civil.
Dear Bar Association. My number one goal isn't to be civil.

The front cover of our bar association journal announces a new series:  “Raising the Bar:  The promise of Civility in Our Profession.”

My skin is crawling and not because I’m a total beast.

I am all in favor of being civil whenever possible.  But sometimes it isn’t.  At least not for trial lawyers.  Our duty is to help our clients get a fair shake.  Rules require that we behave.  But since when did I need to focus on being kind and gracious to the other side.  Especially when they are trying to do bad things.

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Karen Koehlerbar association, legal profession
"Just follow me..."
"Just follow me..."

e have been waiting all week to go to the very tip top of Whistler Mountain. There is an Inukshuk monument up there.  We get off the chairlift and are amazed.  It is gorgeous.  Spectacular.  Imagine a superlative and it applies to the spectacle of the view surrounding us.  After taking it all in, we decide how to go down.  Alysha wants to go down the face.  Cristina is the first to say no.  Noelle and Susan follow Cristina.  Ed follows us, but takes a look over the cliff and turns back.  Alysha looks at me and I can’t say no.  (I need to learn how to say no).  So off they go and I turn left to follow my middle child.

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Karen Koehlerfamily
Whistler - Our Likes and Don't Likes
Whistler - Our Likes and Don't Likes
  • Do like size of Snowgoose #16 and layout
  • Don’t like décor of Snowgoose #16 – think very very ugly (we are so spoiled)
  • Do like the mountains, snow, pretty scenery
  • Do like being with Ryan and the Sullivans (and Greg for 2 days)
  • Do like the smell of the kitchen right now – Cristina and Noelle are making pasta and Garlic bread, Ed is making the salad
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Karen Koehlerfamily
Whistler Winter 2010 - days 2 and 3
Whistler Winter 2010 - days 2 and 3

Today we go up down and around the Crystal chair region of Blackcomb.  We all make it at least once down through the trees.  The snow is pretty much perfect.  There's no ice.  But we whine a little bit about the visibility and cold.

The best part of the day is seeing the sun and blue sky break out as we turn the corner approaching the Excalibur lift.  The worst part is eating our much anticipated take out dinner from Opa the Greek joint.  It is awful.  We usually go there a few times whenever we come but -we're crossing it off our list.  Yuck.

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Karen Koehlerfamily
Whistler Winter 2010 - day 1
Whistler Winter 2010 - day 1

It is a winter snowland.  Big soft flakes are floating down in a most romantic fashion.  Noelle starts laughing and says – Mom look at your dandruff.

We are at the Snow Goose.  Our home for the next week at Whistler.

Mission number one.  Unpack the car.   We aren’t exactly light packers.  Here is what we schlep up the stairs, around the corner, up the stairs into the condo.

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Karen Koehlerfamily
Lionel J. Friedman May 1921 - November 2010
Lionel J. Friedman May 1921 - November 2010

Does anyone know the attorneys or parties in this case, intones the judge.   I see the hand rise as the clipped, precise voice calls out “Yes!”   1,800,000 million people live in King County in the early 2000s.  And there sitting in the box with his bow tie, is Mr. Friedman.  Father of one of my best friends since Kindergarten.

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Karen Koehlergreat people
Embracing ... IT
Embracing ... IT

The cow’s inflated lungs are humungous - I am four.  The brain surgery film makes me a little squeamish - I am in fifth grade.   My dad is a professor of biological structure at the U of W and teaches medical students.  He doesn’t switch off his professor-ish-ness when he comes home.  He dissects the chicken when we are around the dinner table so we can learn about anatomy.  I grow up with a fairly clinical understanding of life and death.

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Karen Koehlerwrongful death
Please give me money I'm hungry

I finish up at the gym and stop at Metropolitan Market in lower Queen Anne on my way home.  Park, rush down the elevator and turn the corner to walk down the stairs.  The woman's strong but not demanding voice stops me.  Please give me money I'm hungry she says.

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Karen Koehlerlawyer life
Rebuttal Pizzazz

The temptation of rebuttal is to make absolutely positively sure the jury is told the right version of the case.  To have the last word and correct the defense.  But the jury wants to get going.  They are ready to start deliberation.  They’ve listened to the lawyers for long enough.  They don’t want to hear a rehash of what they already have been told.

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Karen Koehlerclosing argument
New York day 3 - how hard is it to get up the Empire State Building
New York day 3 - how hard is it to get up the Empire State Building

We probably should read up on the Empire State Building before we get there.  But what can be so difficult about going up an elevator.  Right.

We walk three blocks and approach it apparently from the side.  We see the entrance, but it doesn’t look that big and grand.  We begin to walk further but there is a man who says -  “Do you want to go up the Empire State Building.”  Lesson one.  If someone asks you a question out on the streets of New York, and it is not for directions, move on.

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Karen Koehlerfamily, traveling lawyer
New York day 2 - Auntie Helen and The Lion King
New York day 2 - Auntie Helen and The Lion King

Alysha vows to be up by 6:30.  We don’t get up til 9:30 which technically is 6:30 if we’re in Seattle.  It is raining as we rush out the door headed for Chinatown.  We get on the right subway make the right connection, then start the six block trek from Canal street to 27 Sunshine dim sum restaurant.  For two blocks little Chinese women come running up to us saying “honbo” in their sing song voices.  The first woman gets my puzzled look until I realize, they want us to buy the knock off handbags from the little shops that line the street.  The rain picks up so we raise our umbrellas.  Suddenly, it begins to pour and big gusts of wind kick up around us.  People are trying to fight it and I watch as umbrella after umbrella wooshes inside out.

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Karen Koehlerfamily, traveling lawyer
New York day 1 - AAJ
New York day 1 - AAJ

I’ve agreed to speak for AAJ in New York.  But it is our firm party the night before.

Both our Hoquiam and Seattle offices are together.  We are on the Top of the WAC.  P.A.R.T.Y!    The Pauls are in their Santa Hats.  Everyone is dressed beautifully with sparkles galore.  We finish dinner and are about to begin the gift exchange.  I lean over to Ed and ask him what time it is.  7:40.  Great.  I have twenty minutes before I need to leave.  The volume is growing.  Numbers are called, people get their gifts but can’t unwrap them.  Then they steal other people’s gifts.  But only two steals for any one gift.  These are Hoquiam’s rules. 

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Karen Koehleraaj, lawyer schedule, lawyer convention, traveling lawyer
On being in the moment

My favorite time to go to the gym is 8:00 at night.  It gets dark now at 4:30.  Plus it’s cold, rainy and windy.  Even if I felt like running outside, I would have talked myself out of it.   There’s hardly anyone in the gym this late.  I have a favorite treadmill.  Right in front of the television.  A little too close.  It is mounted from the ceiling and so I have to tilt my head back a little bit to look up at it.    But it is near the window which I crack open.  Ah, precious breeze.   I always look at tvguide.com before I head out to the gym.  I want to know what channel to turn to.  This is another reason I like to go when the gym is empty.  I want to hog the tv.

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Karen Koehlerlawyer life
Voir dire mistakes

The jurors are the ones who are supposed to “speak the truth” in voir dire.  This is not a time for attorneys to dazzle the jury with brilliant manipulative dialogue.

Of what use is eloquence?  He who engages in fluency of words to control men often finds himself hated by them - Confucius

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Karen Koehlervoir dire